One Month Sober Challenge
Before quitting alcohol for good, I had a lot of tries. Here I am writing about one of my biggest accomplishments at that time: Quitting for one month.
It is crazy how vividly these memories are coming back. It is like I am tripping on these recollections.
I remember taking on a challenge; quitting alcohol for a whole month. I wanted to prove to myself that I am not addicted, that I had this all in check. It took all my willpower and discipline to say: “I am not drinking this month, no matter what will come up.”
It was so hard, people were drinking everywhere. They were drinking at work, outdoors and at every gathering. Day by day, it was such a struggle to say no.
On the last days of this challenge, I felt like I had the most boring life of all people in this town. I was looking forward to letting go of that burden of not drinking, and finally enjoy my life again.
When there were 3 days left in my “abstain for one month” challenge I was on a hike with my girlfriend, I saw a man with a beer. I was so jealous. Why could he enjoy a beer and I put such heavy load on myself? Wasn’t life hard enough? Wasn’t I working hard enough? It triggered me so hard and made a knot in my stomach and my throat. I wanted to finish the challenge at all costs, only to prove that I don’t have a problem. I fought through it, sweating and tearing.
Then finally the day of release came. I remember it clearly, it was a Friday, my hope was very strong “please, please hopefully there will be alcohol at work today”. The dream came true on this day, “alcohol and a shit-job”.
I took the bottle at 12:00 it was a Tyskie 0,5l I poured it down fast, like always and instantly took the second. “Yes, yes, yes” such a nice and warm feeling, finally alive again! At 2pm, the work was finished. I drove home and bought 3x 0,5 liter beer bottles, two for enjoying on a bench with 5 cigarettes on my own, and one to take home with me to get the final hit for the day. What a complacency towards my time and energy.
Even though I completed this challenge at that time, and it was good for the mind and the body. My attitude towards alcohol was still very flawed and romantic.
I’d rather be the most boring dude in town without a 9–5 job where drinking is involved. A way more pleasurable feeling!
More of my stories:
- How I Quit Alcohol / The Point I Decided To Quit (My first story)
- 6 Month Of Sobriety
- Beer Got Me Again
- I Will Never Drink Again
- Replacing Alcohol
