How alcohol was able to control my mood and actions.
I had a recollection lately which showed how the drink was able to control me.
One story came to mind especially.
It was one year into COVID, everything that involved fun was cancelled. No festivals, no travel, just being in the same environment day by day.
One evening we decided to meet up at a protected landscape, which is 3 miles away from my place. I went there with a friend to meet another buddy whom I haven’t seen in 2 years. We packed our alco-bags and rode there by bike.
As soon as I had the last drop of my vine, my mindset changed immediately
We arrived at this beautiful scenery with an oak on a sand-dune hill. The other mate arrived shortly after us. We gathered under the oak and started drinking. We had some nice conversations and somebody started to play music with a JBL-Box. Everything was fine and we started to dance. It felt freeing after all the lockdowns.
Then alcohol decided to play his magic trick and dictate my next steps of action. As soon as I had the last drop of my vine, my mindset changed immediately. All I wanted to do was to leave and get more alcohol. The music, the scenery and the friends were seconds.
Both of the others seemed to have the same idea because they were ready to leave in an instant. We headed to a gas-station with one of them. Finally, I got my Jacky-Coke and two beers there.
All of that nervousness for a Jacky-Coke can that just gave me more swindle. Makes me cringe in disbelief nowadays.
I remember how hard the switch was from: Having a lot of fun to wanting to leave immediately.
Instead of having fun and enjoying the situation, I was pulled away from that by alcohol. Because I don’t want to be controlled by something or somebody ever again, the only way for me is sobriety.
More of my stories:
- How I Quit Alcohol / The Point I Decided To Quit (My first story)
- 6 Month Of Sobriety
- Beer Got Me Again
- I Will Never Drink Again
- Replacing Alcohol
